Terrier Tuesday -- Better Late Than Never Edition

Dear Readers,

I know Tuesday is almost over, but as you can probably imagine by my late missive, things have been busy around here. I've got some big terrier news to relate, but first off, I am told by She Who Owns This Blogspace that I must show you how she's doing on the sweater she's been working on, and tell you a little bit about it.

She says to tell you this is a pattern from a Classic Elite booklet called Noble Fibers (the pattern is called "Lush Shaped Cardigan"), and she's knitting it in sportweight Peace Fleece in some grey color -- "Father's Grey" maybe? Leftover yarn from David's sweater from last year.

Anyway, she was going gangbusters on this thing until she got a bit confuzzled by the neck cast-off directions. She thought she'd just put it down for the evening and re-read the directions after a good night's sleep and carry on from there. But then she ended up spending the next couple of days lying in bed on a heating pad and taking lots of drugs because her hips hurt so wicked bad from running and then going to yoga which, to her surprise, exacerbated the hip pain.

She said a lot of bad words for a lot of days in a row, I'll just tell you that. Cranky doesn't even BEGIN to describe it.

She finally got in to see her Wonder Therapist (not Cindy, but Cindy has hired someone else with the same training), and now she's doing pretty fine -- or at least much better than before. So, she says, hopefully she will get back to the sweater, but it turns out she is quite a bit more busy with work than she thought she would be for December. It's all good. More work for her means more toys and treats for me, plus it makes her happy.

She is pinching me right now and saying, "Tell them about the buttons!" The copper buttons from England arrived, and they are very pretty, interesting, and unique, even to a little Yorkshire pudding like me. You can't really tell from this picture how awesome they are, but hey, I'm doing the best I can.

But can we PUHLEEEEEZE talk about me now?!

As you know, I've been having quite a bit of up-close-and-personal time with wildlife of late, and this week was no exception. A couple of days ago, I just ran like a bat out of hell off the deck, like I do, to scare away any wildlife that has the gall to be in our backyard. Usually everything just scatters faster than even I can catch up to it. But I've been working out, dontchaknow, and this time I caught right up to a squirrel! I'm not kidding! I had him right in my grasp! The stupid dummy, he's supposed to RUN! I told him so. I was like, "What.the.heck.are.you.doing? You're supposed to just run up the tree or something!" 

To be honest, I was a little bit stunned, and truth be told, I kinda didn't like the feeling of his furry little neck in my mouth anyway. Actually......... I just didn't know what to do.

But I will deny that in a court of law.

So I barked and I barked, and I told that frickin' squirrel, "Get your fluffy-ass tail UP that tree, and don't you come back DOWN!"  And the squirrel was pretty stunned himself, and he eventually pulled himself together and ambled up the tree, where he heaved his breath and looked at me and he probably thought, "Oh my god, there IS a god."  

I taught him a thing or two, I'll just tell ya. Next time I might not be so forgiving, I'm just saying. 

I'm licking my lips just thinking about it.

So that was my week. How was yours?!

Love,

 

Mr. Jefferies

 

Comments

[Beverly]

Good thing you schooled that squirrel!

[Saul]

Dear Mr. Jeffries, I hacked into my people's account to tell you how much I love you. My people kept telling me I was gay, and I never believed them, but I guess they were right. We should hang sometime.

<3 Saul

[Erin N.]

Tell your Alpha that the sweater looks beautiful, as do the buttons. Now, with regards to that squirrel, you don't think he was sick, do you? Not that I don't have faith in your squirrel-catching abilities, of course...

[gayle]

Well, at least Mr Squirrel was more civilized than Mr Stinky...

[Becky]

So sorry Alpha is going through a rough patch! I am sure she still takes grand care of you, but perhaps she needs to take care of herself! Come on, admit it, you never meant to catch that squirrel!

[marie danis]

Mr. Jeffries. your cute little toes match those copper buttons. Keep up the great security work!

[Liz]

Dear Mr. Jeffries - our current wildlife problem involves the invasion of moles. There are holes everywhere! The boss would love for me to root them out, but I usually just come away with my head covered in mud. Good work on teaching that squirrel a thing or two! Yours in critter patrol, Pepper

[gale (she shoots sheep shots)]

Dear Mr J,
Word. I had the same experience with a raccoon just last month. There I was, stunned, with the hairy invader in my mouth- which proportionately is sort of like you and the squirrel. Or, maybe not, I am a beefy kind of bulldog. Anyhoo, next time do as I did: shake you head back and forth as hard as you can with the critter in your mouth, no need to chomp down, till it is more like a rubber toy. Then drop it and scram as your Person runs around the yard flapping their arms and yelling. They'll lure you away with some kind of Really Excellent Treat (as IF we want to eat something that hairy as a raccoon or squirrel) and they'll bag the carcass. I don't know what they do with it, but I can tell you it wasn't cooked and served in my bowl.
Nice work, J! Smooches from King Bobo

[bullwinkle]

Mr Jeffries,

What King Bobo said :)

Excellent work keeping the ground safe from furry varmints! Be vigilant - they are sneaky.

[Sara]

Oh my god. I always wondered what would happen if a squirrel-crazed dog ever actually caught one.

[Marianne]

Hah! Mr.J, you are beyond (as in waaaay) cute. How funny, I got this visual of you with a squirrel in your mouth.. thinking that squirrel was probably close in size to you,hee.
Alpha's sweater sure is looking good and love the buttons!
You keep after your grand domain, keep those critters in line!
xox

[Justin Bieber Shoes]

She finally got in to see her Wonder Therapist (not Cindy, but Cindy has hired someone else with the same training), and now she's doing pretty fine -- or at least much better than before. So, she says, hopefully she will get back to the sweater, but it turns out she is quite a bit more busy with work than she thought she would be for December. It's all good. More work for her means more toys and treats for me, plus it makes her happy.

[Seanna Lea]

Victor caught a squirrel on Thanksgiving, and his squirrel did not meet so lucky a fate.

Suffice to say that day Victor did not get the standard amount of kibble for dinner and did not appear to mind the reduction one bit.