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    « Faith Restored | Main | Our (Diva) Cups (Almost Never) Runneth Over »

    Thursday, September 10, 2009

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    Cookie

    I promise I will come back next week, read this and laugh. However, right now, not so much because I got caught off guard yesterday. There really should be an opt-out for this monthly nonsense. Think our Ginevra might know who to talk to? ;^)

    Sounds like you need to start carrying a little bag with supplies including some undies. Just in case.

    Margaret in Ontario

    Okay, it's 2:30 in the afternoon and I first read your post early this morning. Had to come back and tell you it was great; I've been smiling on and off all day. And thinking. I used to wear TERRIFIC underwear, and all day I've been asking myself what the hell happened to that.

    Just last night, trudging home from a meeting of acrimonious, crabby volunteers, I thought "You know, I'm NOT living the life I imagined!"

    You think there may be a connection?...

    That's it, Norma. From now on, it's only great underwear or none at all!

    ann

    OMFG!!! Glad I had panties on to catch the pee! I am still laughing. You're killing me. And I am supposedly all done with that. YAY. BUT, I still have a pair of undies, liners and tampons- no fucking disgusting pads for me, thank you very much!

    Doris

    Too funny, Norma! I am of the same certain age that you are and haven't had a period in a while...other than the ones while I was still on the pill that lasted 10 minutes (literally, 10 minutes). The hot flashes however, are killing me, so I am not sure what is better here! I am waking up 5-6 times per night in a sweat. Not good for the sleeping. Oh, well, this too shall pass, as they say.

    Kristen

    Two words already spoken above: Diva Cup.

    Kayten

    Laughed and laughed! The other thing is: Do NOT get rid of whatever you use as you age, even after 10-11 months of no visitations. It will guarantee the recurrence of your period within days for at least 3 months, then nothing for 10 months... get rid of accoutrements... repeat..for 3 years. It's been 3 1/2 years now, but I have to keep pads on hand for other reasons. You just can't win!

    Diane

    OMG!!! What is up with women's health centers? And WOMEN for that matter? Ew? What do you mean Ewww?
    I used to save my magazines to bring to my annual gyn exam visit. Why? Because the only ones available in the waiting room were Popular Mechanics, Sports Illustrated and Women's Day - all over 3 years old, I might add. I felt it was my duty to my sisters to provide some decent (and current) reading matter. Now, I realize, I should be bringing a donation box of TAMPONS to the women's health center! Because, why, of all places, would a women's health center be expected to have such an item available? Perhaps we need to start the Red Stripe Fund in addition to the Red Scarf Fund!

    And, while I'm ranting....I have friends on the other side of menopause who have no clue why it would be useful to have a box of tampons in their home for women who visit! Like friends, daughters in law, grandchildren, like every female under 50! Help out a sister, people! Just sayin'...

    Holly

    This is so TMI, but once I got a tampon stuck up there and I had to get my husband to retrieve it for me. It was both painful and extremely humiliating! I also worked with a woman once who forgot she had a tampon in for months and ended up going to the ER thinking something was bad wrong with her, and they told her they get someone in with a forgotten tampon at least once a week! Ugh! Of course, they probably were just trying to make her feel better... Nevertheless, I am sticking with my granny panties and pads!

    Cookie

    Don't be surprised if hands wander when people hug you from now on. I'm just sayin'...

    tayloe

    Norma,Norma, Norma- don't even know how to respond to this entry!! Just keep'em coming please!

    Lori in Michigan

    Norma,
    You are a frikkin' riot, woman...I'm doing that laughing without sound thing...
    love ya!
    p.s. never met you or Margene, but I'd say she peed her 'sans panties' pants in laughing out loud...a good laugh is great for what ails ya!

    Lyssa

    I love Jockey barely-there thongs. After I started wearing those, nothing else will do.

    The skin-check people probably just assume that your ass doesn't see that much sun. Clearly they don't know what kind of a hussy they're dealing with ;)

    Birdsong

    That's the problem with underwear... you just never know when you're going to need it!

    Sarah

    Speechless.

    Jennifer

    OMG - this is definitely Way TMI... yet this is exactly while I love reading your blog. You're so bold. You're so hilarious. You're making me wet my pants with laughter over here. I'm sorry for your misfortune... but it is going to make me plan ahead when going for my next mammogram.

    minnie

    in my & my daughter's defense, neither one of us uses tampons. i'm not sure why she doesn't, but i have . . . . issues with them,let's say, lol.

    she does use pads, but i use what is basically a disposable divacup. and i wish my period would go away. sigh

    Stephanie

    I'm so late reading this as I'm doing about a month worth of posts. It's hysterical and yet so true. I have product everywhere. In my car, in all of my purses, in my office at work, etc. I think the machines have moved to another country. I can't remember the last time I saw one.

    I guess we are supposed to never have an emergency.

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