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    « 349. Coal in Your Stocking | Main | 351. Holding a Grudge »

    Tuesday, December 16, 2008


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    Hey, sister, if Franklin ever decides to try girls, you're gonna have to get in line behind me! ;)

    I'm so sorry what should have been a painless attempt to up your green quotient has turned out to be filled with so much frustration. :(


    Gah! I hate "doh!" moments like that.

    And no, we shan't be allowing Franklin to switch teams. He's far too valuable a player to go free agent.

    Cindy (maxfun)

    There's a copy waiting for me under my tree (I know that's what's in one of the packages my sister sent 'cause she shops off my Amazon wish list and I peak). I'm waiting to open it and have a good laugh on Christmas morning!

    Glad your laundry room is in working order now. I have a Bosch set (and a dishwasher, too) and love them, but mine's not gas. :)


    Oh, shit.



    Surely you'll not pay the plumber the entire bill?


    This sounds a lot like our refrigerator fiasco from several years ago. It's never easy, that's for sure.


    I've been a lurking reader for quite a while and I must say this has been your most hysterically funny post ever!!! My life works exactly like yours. I have never had any appliance or work done on my house without it taking 14 extra steps and lots of yelling, screaming and crying. I thought stuff like that just happened to me. Oh, and thanks for the "take a pee" warning about reading Franklin's book however, might I politely suggest that that maybe you should have given your readers a pee warning before they read this post!!! ;-)



    Had NOT turned the gas on, ffs. Glad to hear they're up and running. XOX

    Panhandle Jane

    Reading your post this morning has enabled me to deal with my day, which includes tons of stupid questions asked by students during final exam week? No, not about content. Questions like, "Do I have to take the exam?" and "Can I take my exam early so that I don't have to get up so early on Friday morning? I want to sleep late."

    Panhandle Jane

    And evidently I was amused enough to misplace a question mark. See the effect you had on me?


    Oh Norma! I'm happy your w/d are working now. Why are simple things made so difficult?

    I have Franklin's book and it is marvelous. I'm so glad you read it at a good time.


    Seriously, the gas?! The dealer should send you a sympathy gift for having to deal with morons.
    I'll have to get a hold of Franklin's book. I could use a good laugh although your laundry story had me laughing quite heartily when the final punch was the gas wasn't turned on...


    Franklin's book is on my Christmas list. Let's face it, if he posted every fifteen minutes, I'd spend the rest of my life sitting next to my computer waiting...
    May your new washer and dryer spin long and prosper.


    Oh my stars. I'm so sorry you had to deal with this stupidity. Oy.

    A few of my pals are getting Franklin's book from me this holiday season. Perhaps I should slap a warning label on them that says "Caution: Pee before you read!"

    Jean E.

    Seriously funny stuff. Now go felt something.


    I would have been livid too. Glad the book saved you from something drastic.


    I feel your pain....we had a similar experience with our new, very expensive convection double wall ovens, although at the time we thought it was fixed rather simply. Now we find some "issues" with one oven when in convection preheat mode. Makes you sick. Makes me think I'll hang onto my old top-load washer for a while longer!


    I'm surprised you didn't lop off someones head. It was well deserved.
    Franklin's book had me laughing out loud in the Boston airport last October.


    So I guess the plumber's IQ was below 12 then? He should have to return the amount you paid him to do what he was supposed to have done in the first place. Sheesh!


    I wasn't actually laughing at most of your story--I was right 'there' with you, swearing at the dumbassery of it all. grrrrrrrr I hate when guys are all "poor stupid female" about things that they are, indeed, fu*king up!
    Glad you were right, wishing you luck (or perhaps an adult beverage of fortitude) when you dispute your plumber bills.

    p.s. Thanks for saving Norma, Franklin!


    i love franklin's book too!
    and i so feel your pain about the new laundry equipment; i would tell you the story of our very expensive "professional" thermodor range, but i don't want to discourage you. suffice it to say that if we WERE professional cooks, we'd be out of business using this thing.


    That reminds me of how I felt about UPS last week... I'm glad your laundry setup is working now.


    I just got La Harlot's last book; I am saving it for a time when I need to be cheered up. Franklin's book is on my desk -- I only allow myself to read one or two pieces at a time so as to prolong the pleasure.

    Oooh, that sounded... questionable. Heh.

    Cheryl S.

    We should all send a thank-you note to Franklin for saving you. I'm glad we decided not to replace our old washer and dryer. Yet.


    FFS! That plumber owes you.


    And here I thought only I did stuff like that...

    I got Franklin's book at Rhinebeck. Even Grant laughed at some of the cartoons. When I die, I want a stash mausoleum.

    Seanna Lea

    I would have been clawing at the walls. This definitely falls under the heading of Not So Bright. I would have expected your plumber to have an IQ higher than Dubya!


    It's been my experience that the more I spend on an appliance the more fucked up it gets. So I am not investing anymore...not until I win the lotto. I am getting old beater machines that will last a nuclear blast. But it sure does help if the gas is on :)


    um - might that plumber's name be JOE? just askin' ...


    Never, never think about suicide, my dear. Always consider homicide first.


    I received "It Itches" for ... um... can't quite say Christmas since it's been received and opened already, but whatever.
    I'm doling it out slowly.
    I know that I could easily fall into it and read it all in one day and have a stomach that screams at me in exhaustion from all the laughing.
    Instead, I'm using it as the antidote to daily frustrations, which are growing.

    Linda M

    your story about the gas not being turned on reminded me of the time I sat on the phone for many minutes waiting for tech services from the phone company because my internet wouldn't work. After going through all the automated messages and doing all the self-checks and nothing working I finally got a nice young attendant in India who started going through his check list. I had already reset the modem and gotten the lights to come on, but still no internet, and why did I still not have internet you may be asking... because I had forgotten to plug the silly cable back into the 'puter after the thunderstorm that had woken me up in the middle of the night and during which I apparently sleep-walked to disconnect the 'puter to protect it from the dreaded lightening!!!! I made the young man in India's day! and I got my internet back too...

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