Little Things That Are Happening Here, In No Particular Order. I Guess What I Really Mean is: RANDOM WEDNESDAY!

1. I have developed what is known as a trigger thumb. It's not debilitating or seriously limiting or anything, but I am still not amused.

2. I have to do a little bit of reading this semester:

I don't have to read these cover to cover if I don't want to, but who wouldn't want to, especially if one is rather underemployed and can't knit due to injuries (see below) I've read The Handmaid's Tale previously, though I don't remember a thing about it, and there are a couple more I need to get that had not yet made their way into the bookstore. The courses:  "Theory of Lyric" and "Canadian Postmodern." Fun Fact: UVM has a pretty impressive Canadian Studies Department, and one of the few in the country, I'm led to believe.

3. Last night I brought home a nice new soft and snuggly dog bed for Mr. Jefferies to sleep in on the floor in my office. He was thoroughly confused. He thought it was another minion. He tugged it, he chewed on it, he rolled it over, he even humped it (bad Mr. Jefferies!). Stupid me. Because you see:  "Bed" means where Alpha Alpha's sleeping or sitting, stupid! And my office means that the definition of "bed" changes to "my lap, forearm, and with his nose firmly tucked inside my elbow while I knit or type."

Here is a picture of said soft, comfy, snuggly bed:

Please note that said bed is very lonely for lack of Yorkie companionship.

4. I have determined that the medical name for the condition I am suffering in my wrist, elbow & shoulder is: Mr. Jefferies Elbow Syndrome. It's sort of like thoracic outlet syndrome, but it's slightly different in that it is caused by the prolonged sleeping of a five-pound Yorkshire Terrier on one's arm. 

5. Thus the misplaced gift of a new bed for the office, which is like, you might say, the latest medical treatment for Mr. Jefferies syndrome.

6. Said medical treatment is not working very well.

 This arm is mine, all mine.

7. After a long day at work yesterday, I came home to a delightful surprise! Elaine had turned my old ripped skirt into something fantastically fantastic:

Look at the cute beach stone buttons, and the lining inside with an amazing array of pockets -- even one for a water bottle!

I don't know. Some people have more talent in their little fingernail than I'll ever hope to have in my entire body. I swear, it's embarrassing. I'm so excited about this bag, I can't tell you! My wonderful skirt is turned into my wonderful bag! I love it love it love it. 

8. But wait. It was a bit like those Russian nesting dolls. Inside was ANOTHER bag!

9. As I was unwrapping this wonderful object with the dog-print lining, and with a card addressed to none other than Mr. Jefferies himself, I suddenly realized that the adoration that Mr. Jefferies was showering me with after my long day away at work was COMPLETELY SUPERFICIAL, the little ingrate! All that excitement to "see me" was not intended for me at ALL, but for what was in this package. His superior canine nose had already told him that there was SOMETHING INSIDE THIS BAG THAT WAS MUCH, MUCH BETTER than a stupid new dog bed or even Alpha-Alpha coming home from a long day at work.

Oh yes, there certainly was.

10. A big big huge bag of homemade dog treats, and bowWOW, are they delicious. Well, I can't testify to that; I didn't have any. I'm on a low-carb diet, ya know. But according to Mr. Jefferies, they are the bestest treats he's ever had IN.HIS.LIFE. 

11. He spent the rest of the evening trying to trick me into giving him more, more, more. Well, when he wasn't doing this.

12. This is a little-known move in Ultimate Yorkie Wrestling circles called The Pin. It's very easy. You just plant your body weight on your opponent's elbow. It eliminates any weight advantage of the opponent, and totally incapacitates and immobilizes them. If they try to move, you do this:

...place your paws more firmly down on the elbow and give 'em the Sad Eyes. In the unlikely event that the Sad Eyes do not work, you should pull out the ultimate weapon: the Adoring Eyes.

Completely foolproof.
 
 

Comments

[toni in florida]

I can't imagine the sad eyes failing any time, especially on a five-pound body that can positively quiver with sadness. You're a goner, ya know.

[Alison]

Well, at least the soft, warm, cozy, snuggly bed will stay all nice and white on the inside.

Incidentally, the 50-lb greyhound cross in this household employs a remarkably similar strategy. Oh, and thinks he's a lapdog, too.

[Mary]

Be glad Mr. Jefferies only weighs 5lbs. Our 75lb Staffordshire Bull Terrier, Jake, likes to drape himself across my husband's lap when he is on the computer (he works at home). Jake uses my husband's "mouse" arm as a head rest and has been known to "edit" documents in his twitchy sleep.

[gayle]

Love the bags! What an excellent job she did. Beauty and function - perfect!

There is no defense against the Sad Eyes. Dogs are experts at it, and Mr J really excels...

[ringer]

I want a dog!!!

[Donna]

The new bag is fantastic. What a great way to still have your favorite skirt.

Donna

[Wanda in AR]

The new bag is great.

[Margaret in Ontario]

"Alpha-Alpha"? Sure seems like Mr J has you on the Omega track...
Great outcome on the skirt. What talent!
And every time you show a pile of books like that, the pangs begin and I miss it more than I can say. Right down to the yellow "used" sticker! You lucky, lucky woman!

[Ellen]

Oh no. I started with 2 trigger fingers shortly after I started knitting mittens in earnest (up to that point I was only making easy scarves with big needles) and now, 3 years later, I have had 4 fingers "fixed" (surgery) and the other 6 in various stages of aching and clicking. Haven't given up knitting however! And it doesn't bother me much at all to sew. Upstate NY cold weather brings out the worst in them and they are better in warmer temperatures - so it may be time for a vacation south for you!!!

[Elizabeth]

Oooh, more denim refashioning, right up my alley! Those are lovely bags.

I'll just say one thing, after being heartbreakingly (insert sad Yorkie eyes here) hungry after eating a gargantuan amount of food: Phase 2!

Oh and Norma? Are you sure you're the Alpha here?

[marianne]

ok, I had to look up 'trigger thumb' and I'm so sorry, what a PITA!
Those bags are FABulous! and so very well done! LOVE the buttons on both! and those homemade doggie treats? dayum, they look good!

[Adelaide]

You are clearly absolutely, completely, happily besotted. It's understandable. You have fallen for a prince.

[margene]

The bag is absolutely wonderful! Give Mr. J his treats and go fill it up! She did a beautiful job.
If you can't solve the arm issue then Mr. J will need to be called Alpha Alpha.

[Kristen]

Wow! That bag! Wow! (yeah, speechless)

[Joannah]

Hey -- Nice bag!
Surely you know by now who the alpha really is? One look, and who obeys whom?

[Mary Fran]

Lovely bags! And I just get BlackBerry elbow now... and a little carpal tunnel from the track pad.

[Becca]

The bags are amazing!!

I read The Handmaid's Tale years ago as well and also cannot remember a thing about it.

Our dog has a similar wrestling move that she employs whenever one of us sits on the sofa. With precision snuggling, her victim finds that they've take a one to two hour nap without meaning to, all because of a strategically placed dog. We refer to it as "The Chihuahua Stranglehold".

[Cheryl S.]

Crappers on the thumb. Hope you can get that cleared up.

Nice variety of reading materials. Larry is a huge Leonard Cohen fan, though I don't think he's read that book.

[Kym]

I'm always completely undone by the Adoring Eyes. Gets me every time.

[Diane H.]

Great bags - always nice to repurpose a fave garment.

The Yorkie Pin is related to the Portuguese Water Dog Press. It's where the 50 lb. dog puts one paw on your upper arm and the other tapping on your mouse hand while you are at the computer. It's used to indicate all manor of urgency; "time for dinner" being the most popular.

[Rosemary McN]

Love the sweater-the buttons set off the colors beautifully. Enjoy the reading and, boy, do I have bag envy.

[Another Joan]

DElighted to see some favourite authors in that pile. If you can find a cd of Ondaatje reading Running... it is wonderful - I almost didn't return it to the library. Will have to get out Cohen and Kroetsch for a re-read. Maybe instead of Olympic knitting!

[Sheila]

Oooo, The Handmaid's Tale! I read that years ago and it is still by far my favourite Atwood novel...well, after Dancing Girls and The Edible Woman. And Douglas Coupland! Great writer. Loved his novel, Gen-X. And Leonard Cohen! My copy of Beautiful Losers is falling apart. We have some really great author's up here in the frozen north, although we aren't so frozen this year. Margaret Laurence is a great read if you haven't already read her. Her book, A Jest of God, was made into the film, Rachel, Rachel, starring Joanne Woodward. Now I must go reread some stuff.

My cats all use my arm as a head rest, especially when I go to bed. They curl up next to me and take turns lying on my arm/shoulder so they can get as close to my face as possible without actually smothering me. The problem is that they all weigh over 20lbs (just big cats, one can stretch up to the countertops) and if I move they sink their claws and teeth in. Little *****.

My this turned out a little wordier than I thought. Enjoy your two classes, Norma, they sound endlessly fascinating to me.

[elizabeth a airhart]

you like to garden beverley nichols
is fun and witty to read

now that you are no longer head
of the house hold but jeffries
hand maiden - is there a support
group in town or maybe dr phil

[Sunnyknitter]

Love the bag and Mr. Jeffries obviously is a champion Ultimate Yorkie Wrestler. I am very glad our cats did not see him in action. I have to admit I am probably in danger of losing my Canadian status by saying I cannot stand Ms. Atwood. I do make a point of picking up some Canadian lit each time I go home though, so hopefully they won't be revoking my passport just yet! Hope you feel better soon.

[Cookie]

Fabulous bags!

What if you told Mr. J that he wasn't allowed near that new bed? Think he'd fall for it?

[Becky]

Growing up I had a dalmatian who loved blankets, beds and snuggly things more than anything. Mr Jefferies could learn a thing from her!

Great bag!

[Jan in NoFL]

In over 30 with shih tzus and yorkie friends we finally figured it out. You have to the bed on the VERY 1st day you get them, or you can kiss goodbye to them understanding that they needn't be dragging it all over the house or just jumping in and out for excercise. Sorry!

[Jan in NoFL]

Oops 30 years, not 30 dogs!

[Jane Prater]

Trigger thumb?? Go straight for the cortisone. It does work. Thanks for the pic with the books. I have only read Atwood. We ugly Americans rarely know our writers to the north. I will research and read.