Now Norma Knits

Another Great Thing I Stumbled Upon

This one had me laughing 'til I cried one morning this week:

Computer Enhancers.

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Sawyer, My Sawyer

I'll be your little cueball anytime, PoolStick Sawyer.

Red Scarf Packaging Event -- An Invitation From The Orphan Foundation of America -- And I've Been Knitting!

VALENTINE CARE PACKAGE EVENT

Come out and help the Orphan Foundation of America

put a smile on the face of a student struggling to get

an education without the support of a family.

Who:          You (and anyone else who can help out)

Where:       George Mason University – Fairfax Campus

                   Student Union II Bldg., Rooms 5-6-7 

When:         Sunday, February 8^th, 2009

                  11:00am until …… we finish!!!!

Why:           Three times per year OFA send care packages to 2,500 students in our program.  We fill the boxes with goodies, necessities and a whole lot of love and encouragement!  This care package’s special item will be a hand knitted or crocheted scarf!  The scarves are beautiful and each is donated to OFA by knitters all over the world.  Plus we have about 10 other items to fill the box.

 RSVP:        ldavis@orphan.org or call Lynn at 571-203-0270

 This is a fun event for all; friends, co-workers, families, groups, so feel free to forward this around.  Come and stay as long as you can.  We will provide food and drinks to the volunteers.

 

Parking at GMU is available free in lots A, C, J & K so visitor volunteers will not need to pay.  If you choose to park in one of the garages you will be responsible for the parking fee.  (Approx. $2.00 per hour with a daily maximum of $10.00.) 

If you have any questions or need additional information, please contact Lynn via email or call her at either of the telephone numbers listed below.

 Lynn Davis

Manager, Partnership Development

Orphan Foundation of America

21351 Gentry Drive, Suite 130

Sterling, VA 20166

(571) 203-0270 office

(703) 403-2830 mobile

www.orphan.org

 

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I've been knitting on the blue sweater, little bits at a time so as not to hurt my arms and elbows.  As we know, knitting is all about one row at a time.  A couple rows here and there, and before you know it you've got.... well, four rows.  But it's really coming along.  The back is completed, and soon I will be able to divide the front to start the v-neck.  I love this yarn and the fabric it is creating.

Jo Sharp Silkroad DK Tweed, Boheme

(I tried to color-correct the photo, and I think it still came out a bit "off" -- it's too bright a blue in this photo.)

 

Dreams

Yesterday morning I bolted upright from a dream at 4 a.m.

"OH MY GOD!  I missed the last day of medical school!"

In my dream, I was a student and I had forgotten to get up for the last day of classes, which was yesterday.  Of course, as dreams are, it was confusing, because at the same time I was saying, "Why didn't Ally text me?!"  In my continuing confusion, I noticed that my phone had been put on silent and I said, "Oh, no! I left the phone on silent!  That's why she didn't text me!"  Then the fog started to clear, the panic receded, and I went back to sleep 'til 5. 

The second-year students have the month of February "off" (I can feel Ally's hands coming through my screen right now, trying to shake me and say, "Off?!  Off?!  Are you NUTS?!" though she would never do such a thing.) to study for, and then take, the medical board exam.  Following that, they will enter their clerkships in clinical rotations.  Or something like that.  It's all pretty much Greek to me.  But what I do know is, I WILL NOT BE GOING WITH.

Damn. 

There will be some lectures and meetings that I will cover for Ally into the future for a while, but I have come to feel like a part of the class, and the students have treated me as such.  I'm gonna miss them.  Big time. 

If life had been different (like, 178 degrees different), I would have/should have gone to medical school back in the day.  I had the smarts, I had the grades, I had the class standing, I had ... well, everything except any sort of guidance and support, both parental and in the schools.  I am the classic case of "fell between the cracks."  So life handed me this opportunity in my late '40s.  It's been such a gift.  So maybe I didn't fall through the cracks after all.

But anyway:  Pardon me while I go find a corner, my blankie, and my thumb. It's time for a good pout.  

Will everyone please join me in shouting:

Best of luck on the exam, Ally! 

Stumbling Around

Lately I've had a hard time mustering up the emotional energy to write much in the blog. (I know! This is supposed to be my therapy, right? Sigh.)

In an effort to stimulate some creative juices, I've been arse over knickers using Stumble Upon, which -- no doubt about it -- can lead to some interesting and fun things.

Do you like art?  This is so cool.  (Don't get lost over there and forget to come back!)

The following recipe, found here, seems cloyingly, frighteningly pleasureful.  I'd substitute stabilized whipped cream for the Cool Whip, personally.  And I'm not too fond of German chocolate cake mix.  First, hello, it's a mix, and I'm kind of a snob about that.  And second and more importantly, it's not chocolaty enough for my taste.

I'm also wondering a bit about the syntax of that title.  Is it almost better than sex-cake?  or almost better-than-sex-cake?  or it's almost a cake that is better than sex?  or is it a cake that's almost better than sex?  or ..... and what the hell is sex cake?  Perhaps I'm over-analyzing things just a wee bit.  

Almost Better Than Sex Cake

16 servings

1 german chocolate cake mix
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1 14 oz. can sweetened condensed milk
caramel topping
12 ounces Cool Whip
3 heath bars, crushed

Heat oven to 350 F. Grease and flour 9 x 13 inch pan. Prepare cake mix as directed on package; pour into prepared pan. After 10 minutes of baking, sprinkle with chocolate chips. Continue baking until cake is done. While cake is still hot, poke holes in it with handle of wooden spoon. Pour sweetened condensed milk over cake; let cool. Top with caramel sauce, then whipped topping. Sprinkle with candy bars.

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Black Magic Cake, my and my family's favorite recipe for 40 years (!), taken from the back of a Hershey's cocoa can, IS better than sex.  No almosts about it.  That is some serious moist, dark, chocolate cake we're talkin' about.

I still have the original Hershey's can with the recipe I used as a kid.  It's probably still printed on those cans, but I wasn't taking any chances that they were going to discontinue it.  And of course now it's available on the internet. 

Don't like sex chocolate cake?  How about a nice heartwarming letter?

This one, for the chemists, made me laugh out loud:

Table of Condiments
That Periodically Go Bad

1 My Mayonnaise 3 months

2 S Salt N/A

3 H Hollandaise 1 day

4 B Butter 1.5 months

5 Mw Miracle Whip 3 months

6 Hu Hummus 1 week

7 Od Onion Dip 2 weeks

8 Tt Tartar Sauce 3 months

9 V Vinegar 3-5 years

10 M Mustard 6-8 months

11 K Ketsup 5 months

12 P Pepper 4 years

13 Be Bernaise 2 days

14 Ga Garlic Sauce 1 day

15 Cc Cream Cheese 2 weeks

16 Ti Tahini Sauce 1 month

17 Bl Bleu Cheese 2 months

18 R Ranch 2 months

19 Pb Peanut Butter 4 months

20 Lx Lox 2 weeks

21 Pi Pickles 6 months

22 Po Pearl Onion 8 months

23 Cr Croutons 2 months

24 Cs Cocktail Sauce 6-8 months

25 Fi Fish Sauce 5 months

26 Ym Yellow Mustard 6-8 months

27 Ci Chili Sauce 6-8 months

28 Sg Sugar 2 years

29 Gc Guacamole 2 days

30 Ws White Sauce 2 days

31 Sc Sour Cream 3 weeks

32 Th Special Sauce 2 months

32A Th 1,000 Island 2 months

33 Ma Marmalade 2 months

34 V Vegemite 2 months

35 Sy Syrup 8 months

36 Re Relish 6 months

37 Go Green Olive 9 months

38 Ln Lemon 2 months

39 Gs Green Salsa 2 months

40 Sw Sweet n Sour 4-5 months

41 Gm Germ. Mustard 6-8 months

42 Ss Steak Sauce 1 year

43 Nu Aspartame N/A

44 G Gravy 3 days

45 Ch Cheese Sauce 1 week

46 Wc Whipped Cream 2 weeks

47 Vg Vinaigrette 2 months

48 F French 2 months

49 J Jelly 4-5 months

50 Nt Nutella 4 months

51 Fu Fudge Sauce 6-8 months

52 Hr Horseradish 6-8 months

53 Jñ Jalapeño 6 months

54 Oo Olive Oil 6 months

55 Rs Red Sauce 2 months

56 Sf Stir-Fry Sauce 8 months

57 Dj Dijonnaise 6-8 months

58 Ts Taco Sauce 2 years

59 Xx Saccharin N/A

60 Au Au Jus 3 days

61 Cz Cheese Wiz N/A

62 Mg Margarine 6 months

63 Ch Chutney 5 months

64 Hm Honey Mustard 2 months

65 H Honey 8 months

66 Pe Peanut Sauce 8 months

67 Cp Choc. Syrup 6-8 months

68 Bo Baco Bits N/A

69 Pm Pimento 9 months

70 Ds Duck Sauce 4-5 months

71 Wu Worcestershire 1 year

72 So Soy Sauce 1 year

73 Bq BBQ Sauce 6-8 months

74 Ta Tabasco 2-5 years

75 X Maraschino N/A

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This invaluable scientific tool brought to you by F.N.O.R.D., with special thanks to that design genius, Ben Day.

Tired of sex, chocolate, and laughing about chemistry gone wrong?

You could go here and create your own snowflake. 

(Click image to be taken to the website where I found this image via the wonders of Stumble Upon.)

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing. 

~Robert Benchley~

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I was running out of time, and before I knew it and for no reason I can even remember, I was immersed in reading Robert Benchley quotations.  That one seemed to say it all.
Heh.

Dude. You Sistahs Rock.

I'm loving how my post yesterday afternoon brought out all the sexy women of a certain age.  I'm loving how I'm not alone.  I'm loving how....

Well, that's sort of where it ends.  Being a woman, well.... who chose this crap, anyway? 

Hey!  Yesterday I picked up the needles and I knitted a couple inches on the back of a sweater!  And I cooked a nice meal!  And I didn't kill anybody!*

I think I'm doing a'ight. 

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*Of course, as Emma pointed out, who can commit homicide when one is indisposed in such fashion, eh? 

What Makes A Hor-Mone?

Really, you don't want to know. 

I'm just popping in to say hi, to let you know I'm fine.  I am fine, but for the first time since Abigail was born (because I normally have a high hematocrit with no extra help), I've gone shopping for an iron supplement -- just in case.  I've had some extra laundry to do, and I can't stray too far away from a certain room of the house that contains porcelain fixtures.  I'm also thinking of buying stock in some paper products companies.  Can you deduce what the hell I'm being so cagey about?

I remembered something from the back of my mind that ferrous fumarate is the best form of iron supplement to take, for better absorbability, but I did an internet search to see if that was still true (if there's one thing I've learned in popular medicine, it's that the truth changes on a regular basis), and for some reason, I ended up following a link that said something to the effect of "I feel burnt out when I smoke weed and just fall asleep.  Why?"  I followed the thread, and it just kept getting more and more hilarious.  Clueless much?

I started laughing, and I just had to come in here to tell you about it.  I think I'm getting punchy. 

I LOVE a Challenge, and It's a Damn Good Thing

The Scene:  The large gym/multi-purpose facility at UVM

The Event:  "An Event Fit For a King."  Martin Luther King III, to be exact.

Kind of a big deal.  Audience of oh, I don't know, 1,000ish people?

I'm sitting there at my post at the back of the gym, stenoing away to beat the band, LIVE.  The guest of honor was S-P-E-A-K-I-N-G.  The lights were all off.  The captions were being projected up onto a big screen in the front of the gym.  I was W-E-A-R-I-N-G  H-E-A-D-P-H-O-N-E-S.  Not little earbuds, but a big, official-looking headset. 

A university police officer walks up to me from the side, bends down near my face, and says, "Excuse me."

I look at her.

"Where do I find the assistive hearing devices for the hard of hearing?"

"Up front," I say, and continue to write steno. 

"Up front?  Up front where?" 

"I.DON'T.KNOW.FOR.SURE."

steno-steno-steno-steno

"Oh, OK, thank you."

Ally says she would love to see an MRI of my brain taken while I'm working.  I dunno.  I think I might blow up the machine. 

My team is awesome.  They sat chuckling and saying afterward, "At least you're still smiling."  Well, you know, she was wearing a badge.  Or something.  But even so.  People don't get AT ALL what it is that I do, even when they literally SEE me doing it. 

I have a reputation on campus for "always smiling," many people have told me. You're so lucky.  Only YOU get to see the not-good-natured side of me. Well, David and a few other people might beg to differ with that statement.