Well, I'm back on Vermont terra firma, with plenty of fresh memories from yesterday's jaunt with Sandy to Gloucester and Rockport.* What's all this about rotten weather that everyone keeps going on about? Everywhere *I* go, the weather seems to be fine! (I think I'd better just shut my mouth!)
I know you don't have all day to read about my memories of G & R, but there are a handful that are just too rich not to share.
1. The Gloucester Fisherman Causes Tempers to Flare
You can see by my photo how incredibly busy it was around there (not). Sandy and I were trying to find me my Gloucester fisherman (the things we will do for the sake of the blog), and there was this wonderful statue in the middle of town just ripe for the taking. We parked the car and went to the statue for our photo session. There were two women ahead of us, taking photos, and we waited about 30 seconds for them to finish, then we set about with our silliness:
...to hopefully take fun photos of the new clam salt and pepper shakers Sandy got at Woodman's,where we had just had lunch. (Woodman's is listed in my book of 1,000 Things You Should See Before You Die. 999 to go.) We no sooner had set our happy little clams out when Sandy stepped back to take a photograph of them. A man appeared from nowhere from behind me and jumped in to take a photograph of the statue at the same time Sandy stepped back to take hers, and bumped into her. He grouchily said, "Do you MIND?! I'm trying to take a picture here!" Sandy apologized all over herself as if it were her fault, and said, "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't see you there," and we both stepped away so he could take his frigging picture and get out of our hair. He left. We got back to our business. The next thing we know, he was standing several feet away from us, and again said, "Do you MIND!? I want to take a picture of that with NO PEOPLE in it!" He was just a grumpy fart (and not so old so it was permissible because of his dodderingness, either).
Cookie would have been so proud of me. Before I even knew what had come over me, I looked at him and growled, with slime dripping from my fangs, "No, do YOU mind?!" Oh, there was more. Oh, yes, there was. (But I was very civilized in that I did not tell him in these exact words to FUCK OFF.) He whimpered, "But I'm only here for a short time!"
I'm sure that 30 seconds he might have to wait was going to throw his tourist schedule all out of whack.
And you have the gall to wonder why I hate people.
2. Sandy's Thinking Big
Sandy said, "If I lived here, think of how much weeding you'd have to do!"
3. Always Thinking of Dave Daniels (It was Wednesday, after all.)
4. "Can we take a photo of your shirt? Don't worry, we're not taking a photo of your butt."
"Oh, that's OK. I don't mind if you do."
*Sorry, Mary K., it was a last-minute decision that took us there and I didn't have your phone number.